Finding My Self-Worth

I have been called an overachiever my whole life. As a child, I continually sought the approval of the elders in my life. My greatest fear was disappointing them. It never occurred to me that having my own dreams was even a possibility. I have collected degrees, certifications and extra trainings to make me feel worthy.

I have also struggled with weight and body image issues since childhood. My mind and body seemed to be in constant competition with each other. Every time I gained a little more weight, I’d seek another degree or certificate to compensate for it; but that achievement never felt like enough, and I’d eat to punish myself for that. It was a vicious cycle that I wasn’t consciously aware of.

I clearly remember the moment I realized my weight and pursuit of knowledge were intimately connected. I was at an awards ceremony, and I noticed all the women receiving awards were thin. In that moment, I truly believed that no matter how hard I worked, I would never earn one of those awards because of my weight. My body was my “fatal flaw.”

As I sat at the table surrounded by colleagues, I felt exposed, vulnerable, and like I didn’t belong. In the coming months, it became clear to me that my entire self-worth was wrapped up in my weight. And I had no idea who I was, or what I really wanted from my life, aside from the desire to be thin.

It took a lot of deep work and soul searching but I eventually got to know who I was beyond the size of my body. I went on a “no diet-diet” to let go of all the rules I had around food and my body. Eventually I was able to liberate myself from the belief that my value in the world was conditional on the way I look. I now know, with complete certainty, that my value comes from being the bold, brave and fiercely passionate woman that I am.

It’s this journey that put me on the path to becoming a Mind Body Eating Coach and a Life Coach. I see so many ambitious, overachieving women not embracing their fullest potential in their personal and professional lives because of their weight or body image. My mission is to empower these women to separate their self-worth from the size and shape of their bodies, and to turn all the energy spent on self-criticism and self-shaming into connecting with themselves on a deeper level, making decisions that support their best selves, and cultivating stronger relationships with others. I coach them into feeling confident, authentic, and alive in their bodies.

ABOUT DR. MICHELLE TUBMAN
Dr. Michelle Tubman is an emergency physician, a certified life and weight loss coach, and a mind body eating coach. She is the founder of Wayza Health, where she helps ambitious, professional women embrace their fullest potential, love themselves in the body they’re in, and lose weight with joy and confidence. You can find her at www.wazyahealth.com.