When I was nine years old, I decided that I was too chubby and needed to go on a diet. First, it was all about not eating at night, then it became about exercise and later it went into full-on restriction of all kinds of food.
When I was 23 years old, I landed in a treatment facility because my body was slowly giving up and so was my psyche.
As a result of struggling with food and my body throughout my teenage years, I missed out on many things: birthday parties, date nights, the first innocent kisses with a boy. I missed out on having silly times with my peers, enjoying the high school years and living the carefree life that nine or ten year olds really should have.
Yet when I admitted myself into treatment, I knew that even though I had wasted many, many years on trying to be the thinnest, the fittest, the bestest of all, I now had a second chance to make my life meaningful and worth living.
That’s when I decided to heal. Not just on the surface, but on the inside. I wanted to heal everything that had brought me to this point of no return. And I did.
When you struggle with food, it’s not really about food at all. It’s about everything else in life. Thus, I had to take a hard look at my relationship, my future, my past, my wants, desires and needs. For the first time, I really allowed myself to be honest and share what it was I wanted and that was freedom, happiness, ease. The simple things in life that seemed so elusive and reserved for everyone but me.
Fast forward 4.5 years and my relationship with food and life is exactly that: filled with ease, happiness, daily acts of joy and love. My broken body, the body I had hated for so long, gave me a beautiful baby boy. My personality, the character traits I thought were so flawed, gave me a beautiful connection with a guy. My life, the life I had almost thrown away, gave me the chance to help others who are living life on the sidelines only waiting for their body to finally look worthy to them.
Energy, peace of mind, presence and ease are all necessary to live the life I am living today. And in order to achieve these states, I have to take care of my body with food that love my body back and self-care techniques that also nourish my soul. Whenever I notice that I am going off track, I journal, meditate and remember that what I really want is not thinness or perfection, but a life worth living. A life filled with dinners with friends, connection with nature and lots of cuddling with my son and boyfriend.
Pure freedom from food is not something you achieve over night, but if you are mindful, get support and are determined, it is possible for everyone.
Compassionate. Creative. Adventurous.
Anne-Sophie Reinhardt serves women who are struggling with their weight and food to accept and respect their body by connecting them with their inner world and giving them tailor-made action steps that’ll heal their food shame and daily guilt trips. The results she’s been able to achieve with her clients include the ability to live life without thinking about food and weight 24/7, feeling truly confident in the body, stepping into the family portraits again, going on a trip to Italy that was previously impossible due to an imperfect physique and learning to love exercise instead of hating the daily walk to the gym. For more information go to: http://annesophie.us